THEY'RE NOT THAT FUCKING GOOD! AND I HATE THAT GODDAMN "CRUNCH" NOISE!
Yes, I asked for a bike. No, I'm not 7.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
This is my Christmas present from the husband. The only catch? I'm not allowed to ride it by myself around the neighborhood. Something about the meth heads getting rape-y and maybe stabbing me.
Looking for the non-white opinion
Thursday, November 19, 2009
The latest book we had to read for book club was "The Help" by Kathryn Stockett. Apparently EVERYONE loved it. Except for me. Here's why:
It was written by a white woman who was raised largely by her family's black maid. She wanted to explore the "other side" and write about what it was like to be a black maid in the South during the early 1960's. Much of the book is written from the point of view of two black maids. That's all fine and good. HOWEVER, I think that the way Stockett wrote it smacks of racism. I mean, she has her black characters talking like Mammy from fucking Gone With the Wind. Maybe I'm wrong, but I just have this feeling that there's no way black people in the South speak like pickaninnies, and to have them do so in the book is total bullshit and makes them sound less than intelligent. Oh, and I forgot to mention: one of the maids has all the properties of the "Magical Negro" stereotype (all her prayers for other people miraculously get answered), which is just completely vomitous. Maybe this quote from the Huffington Post can help explain it for me:
I posit that, as a white person, you can empathize all you want with the plight of blacks, but you will never, ever, EVER know what it's truly like to be discriminated against, live in fear, be judged by the color of your skin, etc. And to write a book acting like you do is completely disrespectful and insulting to those who actually has to deal with those issues. That's like me writing a book on what it's like to be a Japanese person in America in the 1940's. It's ludicrous.
Unfortunately, the book club ladies think this book was the tits and SO meaningful and SO wonderfully written and SUCH a good book. I need concrete reasons, from people who are NOT white (because they all are) as to why this book is a crock of shit. Otherwise, it's going to be another week of me being the opinionated, loud bitch,
It was written by a white woman who was raised largely by her family's black maid. She wanted to explore the "other side" and write about what it was like to be a black maid in the South during the early 1960's. Much of the book is written from the point of view of two black maids. That's all fine and good. HOWEVER, I think that the way Stockett wrote it smacks of racism. I mean, she has her black characters talking like Mammy from fucking Gone With the Wind. Maybe I'm wrong, but I just have this feeling that there's no way black people in the South speak like pickaninnies, and to have them do so in the book is total bullshit and makes them sound less than intelligent. Oh, and I forgot to mention: one of the maids has all the properties of the "Magical Negro" stereotype (all her prayers for other people miraculously get answered), which is just completely vomitous. Maybe this quote from the Huffington Post can help explain it for me:
Writing for Ms. Magazine, Erin Aubry Kaplan wonders, "Why must blacks speak dialect to be authentic? Why are Stockett's white characters free of the linguistic quirks that white Southerners certainly have?" The Christian Science Monitor notes the same problem, wondering about the "decision to convey only black voices in dialect, with nary a dropped 'g' among her generally less sympathetic Southern white characters."
I posit that, as a white person, you can empathize all you want with the plight of blacks, but you will never, ever, EVER know what it's truly like to be discriminated against, live in fear, be judged by the color of your skin, etc. And to write a book acting like you do is completely disrespectful and insulting to those who actually has to deal with those issues. That's like me writing a book on what it's like to be a Japanese person in America in the 1940's. It's ludicrous.
Unfortunately, the book club ladies think this book was the tits and SO meaningful and SO wonderfully written and SUCH a good book. I need concrete reasons, from people who are NOT white (because they all are) as to why this book is a crock of shit. Otherwise, it's going to be another week of me being the opinionated, loud bitch,
Easy, breezy, Fresh and Easy
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
About a month ago, I received an e-mail from Kristen over at Motherhood Uncensored, asking if I would want to participate in a Fresh and Easy event at Sur La Table for Phoenix bloggers. After I'd verified that she was indeed real and that she had actually read my blog and STILL wanted me to participate, I said yes, because, really, what the hell else am I going to do as an unemployed person freelance writer?
Fast forward to yesterday morning, when I woke up feeling like someone dropped a house on my face, mostly because Old Man Husband insisted that sleeping with the windows open in 45 degree weather would be good for my humors and blood or whatever. I was still feeling punky in the evening, but decided to put on my big girl pants and go anyways, mostly because there was going to be food. And free stuff.
I am SO glad I decided to go. Not only were all those hours spent sitting on the couch, unwashed, in my pajamas and blogging finally validated, I also met so many amazing bloggers (like Sydney and her food porn blog) who were so sweet and friendly. After being plied with a good amount of liquor, Chef Cindy rang her little bell and attempted to teach us all how to make some recipes using a combo of fresh ingredients and Fresh and Easy shortcuts (didn't you like how I made that sound totally natural and not at all like a plug for Fresh and Easy? Shop at Fresh and Easy! FRESH AND EASY!).
I was lucky enough to be at Vivian (with husband, Arthur) and Kristen's table, where Kristen was the only one sober enough to read the recipe card (thank god she's pregnant!). After we managed to cobble together something that looked remotely like what the recipe said, we got to EAT. And ohmygod, was it ever good. Like, fetch-me-my-silver-wand-I-must-make-room-in-my-stomach good. Oh, and even better, I was lucky enough to be win a raffle prize of sparkling wine and a F&E gift card. How could I not love this event?
I've babbled enough, let's look at some pictures!
Fast forward to yesterday morning, when I woke up feeling like someone dropped a house on my face, mostly because Old Man Husband insisted that sleeping with the windows open in 45 degree weather would be good for my humors and blood or whatever. I was still feeling punky in the evening, but decided to put on my big girl pants and go anyways, mostly because there was going to be food. And free stuff.
I am SO glad I decided to go. Not only were all those hours spent sitting on the couch, unwashed, in my pajamas and blogging finally validated, I also met so many amazing bloggers (like Sydney and her food porn blog) who were so sweet and friendly. After being plied with a good amount of liquor, Chef Cindy rang her little bell and attempted to teach us all how to make some recipes using a combo of fresh ingredients and Fresh and Easy shortcuts (didn't you like how I made that sound totally natural and not at all like a plug for Fresh and Easy? Shop at Fresh and Easy! FRESH AND EASY!).
I was lucky enough to be at Vivian (with husband, Arthur) and Kristen's table, where Kristen was the only one sober enough to read the recipe card (thank god she's pregnant!). After we managed to cobble together something that looked remotely like what the recipe said, we got to EAT. And ohmygod, was it ever good. Like, fetch-me-my-silver-wand-I-must-make-room-in-my-stomach good. Oh, and even better, I was lucky enough to be win a raffle prize of sparkling wine and a F&E gift card. How could I not love this event?
I've babbled enough, let's look at some pictures!
Ingredients for one of the recipes we made, cranberry sausage stuffing
Vivian, CUI (Cooking Under the Influence)
Kristen, measuring and cooking
Chef Cindy, showing us how to brine and baste the turkey (it was fucking GOOD)
THE. FOOD.
More food. So, so good.
Dessert. I didn't even use the fork, I just put my face directly on the plate.
I'm a winner!
The schwag. Kittah approves.
Overall, I had an amazing time. Thank you to the fabulous marketing team at Fresh and Easy, Chef Cindy, the wonderful people at Sur La Table and, best of all, the amazing Phoenix bloggers for making last night so great.
(SHOP AT FRESH AND EASY!)
sorry...
Monday, November 16, 2009
It's my party and I'll swear if I want to
Saturday, November 14, 2009
I just received world's most uppity message on Facebook from the wife of Rob's friend. This lady is 100% "YAY JESUS" and apparently she was most hideously offended that I, as a Christian, DARED to use the word "fuck" in my status update. She felt that that other Christians would be offended, too, and that, as a Child o' Christ, I'm not portraying Christians in an appropriate light:
Ok, first of all, I know a shitload of "true Christians" who act like normal people; they swear, drink, fuck, laugh, etc. Religion takes all kinds of people and if I recall, didn't that Jesus fellow say something along the lines of "Judge not, lest ye be judged"? Second of all, who are YOU to decide who is a "true Christian" and who may or may not be offended? Third of all, if you don't like what I have to say, DON'T READ WHAT I HAVE TO SAY. Lastly, what I write is most oftentimes funny, tongue-in-cheek, snarky and/or playful. I'm not railing against the Jews or black people or calling for the disembowelment of small babies. I'm UPDATING MY FUCKING FACEBOOK STATUS.
I didn't bother to respond because the woman is completely ridiculous and arguing with her would be like arguing with a wall. She's so dead-set in her beliefs and moral superiority that me talking to her would be, in her opinion, like talking directly to Satan himself.
I've said it before that older people and my relatives shouldn't be on Facebook and I've gotten in a shitload of trouble for it. So let me amend my statement: If you didn't join Facebook while in college AND just recently joined AND are offended by ANYTHING you see while online, LEAVE. NOW. It's a fucking social network, not bible study, and it's mostly populated by Generation Y, the loudest, most annoying, most foul-mouthed people ever to walk the planet. And we don't have room for thin-skinned, uppity, faux-Christian, judgmental bitches.
Hi Rebecca,
From your posts the last few months, I have noticed that you often use the "f" word. I know you don't want to hear this...but as a Christian..this is offensive to me and other true christians out there who knows that you may be a christian. I know you are human and I know this is your own page and post... I am just thinking about how this reflects about Christ to the world out there.
Is everything okay? Have I said or done anything to offend you? I know you may not want to talk with me ever but I just thought to send you this quick note.
Thanks you...
[Name redacted]
Ok, first of all, I know a shitload of "true Christians" who act like normal people; they swear, drink, fuck, laugh, etc. Religion takes all kinds of people and if I recall, didn't that Jesus fellow say something along the lines of "Judge not, lest ye be judged"? Second of all, who are YOU to decide who is a "true Christian" and who may or may not be offended? Third of all, if you don't like what I have to say, DON'T READ WHAT I HAVE TO SAY. Lastly, what I write is most oftentimes funny, tongue-in-cheek, snarky and/or playful. I'm not railing against the Jews or black people or calling for the disembowelment of small babies. I'm UPDATING MY FUCKING FACEBOOK STATUS.
I didn't bother to respond because the woman is completely ridiculous and arguing with her would be like arguing with a wall. She's so dead-set in her beliefs and moral superiority that me talking to her would be, in her opinion, like talking directly to Satan himself.
I've said it before that older people and my relatives shouldn't be on Facebook and I've gotten in a shitload of trouble for it. So let me amend my statement: If you didn't join Facebook while in college AND just recently joined AND are offended by ANYTHING you see while online, LEAVE. NOW. It's a fucking social network, not bible study, and it's mostly populated by Generation Y, the loudest, most annoying, most foul-mouthed people ever to walk the planet. And we don't have room for thin-skinned, uppity, faux-Christian, judgmental bitches.
I'm in the Becky Club... and you're not
Thursday, November 12, 2009
But if you're a blogger whose name is Becky or some variation of Becky, please contact Becky at Steam Me Up, Kid to be part of the Becky Club section on Becky's blog's sidebar. Also, I'm going to say "Becky" as many times as possible. According to Becky, "We don't ever meet or pay dues, but once we have formed a giant army of Beckys, we'll do something awesome like storm a castle or avenge some injustice somewhere."
Join now!
Join now!
beyond rude
Monday, November 9, 2009
to everyone who is asking me WHEN rob and i will be reproducing: it is none of your fucking business. we've been married for less than a year. it's between the two of us and ONLY the two of us. if we decide to tell you, then fine. until then, back the fuck off.
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